Growing I

Lim Kah Mun,so far I have known you for a long time,a very long time!

Age 1 - 3
You were first landed in Kuala Lumpur on 13th of October 1992. You was named Lim Kah Mun. Your Chinese name was a common one. =P You were cute! You had broke a right arm's bone at age 3 while jumped off from a cupboard =.= ,fortunately it healed.

Age 4 - 6
You had a precious moments in kindergarten. You were a cheerful and active girl. You were cute. You had a small ponytail. You had got a lot of trophies in sports and studies. You were a small nerd. You were hardworking enough in managing your studies. You got a good results,especially in Maths. You were able to do primary school level of Maths in that age. You were strong enough in everything!

Age 7 - 12
SJK (C) Confucian was amazing for her! =D
You joined dance club,drawing club,and singing club at primary school. You loved to dance in aged 7-9. You had learned and you were successfully in putting your head on your knees with your legs straight! You had performed a dance during sports day! You had a nice drawing and your products had posted on the school board. (: You loved to play hide-and-seek with friends,and chased all around with them in the field. You had a high-tech education,where the teaching method was showed on TV and the teacher was in front of the PC and explaining the lessons =P. You loved Science and Maths. Your memorable experiment was RAINBOW experiment with a triangular prism. =D. You loved to play Mimosa Pudica (Sensitive plant) at the field. You had so much fun,and went through all sad moments. You had a first period at age 11. You had a tonne of homework and you had been stayed until morning just for completing all the homework. LOL.

Age 13 - 17
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P/S: More coming next =P

Dear self

This is a long overdue letter,and for that I am sorry. In fact, a lot of what I want to say in this letter is about apologizing. I never made a conscious choice to hurt you. And yet I have in so many different ways. Strangely enough,my motivation for doing most of the abusive I did to you was about trying to make me and us feel better.

I am sorry the way I have treated you,the matter went badly until you feel tired and numbness. Your heart is broken. Your mind has messed up. Your health is very bad. I am sorry for the things I have said and for the complete lack of faith I have had in you at times. I apologize for not regarding you in the way you deserve,and most of all for not placing your needs above all others. I have looked everywhere but to you the love I need. I have done things and acted in ways that are shameful.

I know you know that our journey will be a LONG one,our dream,our target,our desire,and it will be far from easy. I am afraid that I will fail again,and there is a voice that speaks loudly warning me to not even try,that I am only asking for disappointment. But you deserve a hundred more attempts at getting it right and if that is what it takes,well then,a hundred more will be.

I know,as you do,that the journey will be filled with steps forward,followed by steps back. But that is okay. Each day I will wake up with a renewed effort and a humble prayer for the guidance I need to get back to you and to the spirit that is truly me.

I know you forgive me and I am so grateful for that. Today is a new day,and,with your love and support,I will take those small,but very important,steps forward.

Me.

The truth!

From now onwards,I will not cry,I will not sad and depressed,I will not hurt myself,I will not care about it anymore,I will not.......... ):

Promises are all becoming lies!

Promises are all becoming lies!

Promises are all becoming lies!

Promises are all becoming lies!

Promises are all becoming lies!

Promises are all becoming lies!

Promises are all becoming lies!

Promises are all becoming lies!

Promises are all becoming lies!

Promises are all becoming lies!

Promises are all becoming lies!

Promises are all becoming lies!

Promises are all becoming lies!

P/S: Broken promises!!!!!! ='(

Valentine's day

Valentine's Day! Why didn't I put "Happy" Valentine's Day? By the way,Happy Valentine's Day to everyone on the earth.(:

For me,today is a normal day. As usual,I drove off to college early in the morning,today's classes are filling with Chemistry,Physics,Maths,and Biology(Lab).

I was glad that I spent 1/4 of 14th February with those classes just now, 1/4 of 14th of February with assignments and revisions, 1/4 of 14th of February with sleeping, and 1/4 of 14th of February with.....TV,radio,and online! (: Yeah,at least I won't hide myself in a corner again and start to emo! >(

To be honest,although I was pretending to be busy by today,I could feel the pain deeply inside from my heart,brain,and my whole body. I got a headache! I was stunned in class. I really have no idea,I keep thinking of him,I miss him badly! I wished to know about his condition right now,does he fine? Hmmm... Our SEPERATION's reason was still a mystery,but I know it thou...We did a major mistake,especially me! But he didn't tell me anything,and only asked to be friend. ): Yes,I respect your decision! ): I know last time I was being quite stubborn but I was not purposely,I realized this is my fault for doing so! He was fault too,he had found a lousy reason to make the seperation! And he decided to keep silent until now! I know that why he does so! ): It is a time matter,hopefully time will heal everything,forget the past and forgive our mistakes,and don't repeat again! >( About the chance? The opportunity? I pray for it ONCE AGAIN! hmmm ): I am not able to do anything to save IT right now,what should I do? =/ I'd better focus on my studies first right! Mun is praying! I hope he is doing fine too...(: Whatever,we must be stronger in this moment!

Promises are all becoming lies!

Do you agree,man? =/

Mun....Don't cry again,please! Everything will be fined! It will go smoothly!

P/S: (:

Are these signs of health problem?

Sigh,I know health is very important in our life,if we are health only then we can get everything such as success,wealth,and happiness. Without health,you would die. Nope,you would completely die,your life will be taken away. You won't be able to see the world anymore. I always advice all the people with me to take care of their health,especially to my family and friends,and even my love one? Therefore,it is a basic human need comprised. =/ Do you agree,man?

I am worried....I am getting extremely worry and worry. To be honest,I will go for a blood testing and body scanning every year,but I stopped to do so since I graduated high school. Last year,I became more comfortable with my body health,I seldom got sick,I was glad when I felt so much better each and every day,it went smoothly,I got a full attendance in my college. =D

Perhaps this year is a challenge year for me,I feel like wanna straight away jump into year 2012 to see what will I be. Nevertheless,troubles keep arising from January until now. Sigh,the wound on my leg is slightly pain,when will it be cured? The broken heart,when will it be mended? The state of worry,when will it be over? The pressure,when will it be stopped? For your information,PRESSURE from studies or work wouldn't be stopped,unless you're died. After a war,another war will be coming again!

This recently,I really have no idea about what's wrong with me! I feel that my heartbeats is faster than usual,for sure my heart is pumping faster! I've been checked my blood pressure at my aunt's house last year,the results was negative! =(
Now I worry if I do have high blood pressure? =(

Next,I found myself difficulty getting to sleep,so it should be known as INSOMNIA. I can't sleep well in these 2 months. Ya,I know that I think so much,think about the solutions,think about the future,think about the past,and much more..Ewwww,seriously,I want to know what kind of person I am!!! =/ You're such a weirdo! Please wake up! *SLAP MYSELF* >(

In addition,if you ask how much hair I drop per day,I'll answer you I drop so much hair every day! I know it is normal for teenagers. But the amount of hair drop seems unusual,I think I am stressed out,or lack of intake of iron,or I have an illness?...So it causes hair loss....hmmmmm What should I do? =/

Hmmmmmm......

Actually I don't dare to go for a blood test this year,I worried that I will face with a bad results from my body report..I scared I will lost concentration in my studies if I know that...But...sigh....if I do not know my body report,I am worry too...hmmm...What should I do? =/

P/S: =/

Gifts (:

I just received a few Chinese New Year's presents this week. After the college reopened,yes,this is the crazy,what a hectic life I live. With assignments and friends. At least this makes me not to think so much and not to recall all the sad thoughts again,I want to let go the past,I want to be stronger,I want freedom! =D And much more :9

Its been 4 days after the college reopened,and my last semester of A level is starting now,it would not be stopped until June 2011. I wish I could do better than last time,this is the last chance,I need to be able to make myself proud before leaving the college. I like everything in my college,how time flies,and time is not waiting for me,I have to make all my days pretty well before the time is gone!

Everybody is asking me that where will I go to further my studies after A level and what will I take for my degree level? Actually,I have two options in my mind now and I am still doubting,haha...I would like to further my studies in either pharmacy or chemical engineering. =/....I feel interested in both of them,therefore I've to sacrifice one at last,and also depend on my results..Well,there will be 50% I will leave KL,and another 50% will stay in KL for my degree level. If I leave the KL,there will be 50% I will go to Australia,and another 50% I will go to Selangor! (:

Back to the main topic,about my Chinese New Year's presents,I got a big Angpao from my Maths lecturer,that's he rush the lessons in 4 days' time and perhaps he will do the same thing later in this morning,so I have a tonne of assignments for Maths..What a great present from him! Gonna catch up the works soon. Thanks man! =D *I realized that Maths could train and make my brain actively* (:


Secondly,I am now slightly addicted to alcohol,=.=..I don't know why! I thought I will hate alcoholic drinks forever! I seldom touched alcoholic drink,not even a mouthful. This Tuesday I've drank 2 glasses of red wine,it was my first time by taking a large portion of alcohol. It's really taste bitter,but NICE! =D I felt a little heat in my body,and I felt dizzy at last. Yeah,it stopped me from thinking so much again! Don't bend into the wrong way and turn out! Anyway,I feel much better,alcoholic drinks really can make me relax,lighten and ease up my mind all the day =D...<3


Next,something bad is happened again,it considers as a gift too? MAYBE. Yesterday,I slipped and fell over in my home after college. My leg did not hurt badly but bleeding badly,5cm x 1cm part of the skin is peeled off accidentally. I am so hurt and keep suffering the pain of wound! Hope I will get well soon! (:


Thanks to my friend,Ngar Mun who bought me and our friends a pack of chocolate from Dubai.

P/S: Enjoy my studies! (:

Family Day

We had a great family day out by yesterday,and we had so much fun all the day! (:
I've booked 4 tickets from Golden Screen Cinema's website,so yeah,WE-my parents,brother and I went for a movie by yesterday,guess what movie we watched? It was "I love Hong Kong",oh my,I could conclude that the COMEDY movie was once again! =D I'd prefer comedy movie rather than others because it deletes tension,stress,sadness from my mind!


Can you recognise this place? Yea,it's Berjaya Time Square's main stage.


After the movie,we headed to "Koong Woh Tong",ah,I had eaten a bowl of herbal jelly a.k.a turtle jelly? =D Oh,it cooled down my whole body,thanks herbal jelly. =D
I felt relieved once again!



Soon,we went to eat sushi at Sushi King restaurant,it was the second time I ate sushi at Sushi King,haha,at last we had finished 10 plates of sushi!


Can you guess what time I captured this photo?
Answer: 7.15pm with sunset! =D Those dark clouds started to fill the blue sky and it slowly turned into dark sky!

After that,I walked to the Pavillion from Time Square and Sungai Wang with my brother,while my parents were shopping at Time Square. I passed by Bukit Bintang on the way to Pavillion,I did not know why,I recalled a lot of sad thoughts again while walking on the street...=.=...Moreover,I did not realized that I've been walking for so long with my brother. *I'd prefer to walk alone*.


We reached the Pavillion within 15 minutes. I've bought a pencil case from there!

This tiring day was great and fun! =)

P/S: Happy Chinese New Year!
P/S: College-ing is right here with ME now! =D